On the Search for a Husband

I think it was around 5:30 in the evening when my father called me at the office to talk about my future as I would never think of it the same again. It started something like this:

"Honey, you know, you're 22 now and you're not a baby anymore. You have to start making real decisions now. You have to stop making bad ones, because you're going to be very unhappy in 20 years if you do."

This preposterous diatribe went on for 45 minutes and covered all of the bases. Here are some of the highlights:

American boys have no value system. They'll dump you as soon as you run into your first fight (and leave you with your children!). Then we won't be able to talk to them, b/c they won't know Chinese.
A good Chinese boy will do whatever you want. You would never have to work again. They will NEVER leave you (Is he trying to pull at some non-existent heartstrings here?).
You don't want to turn into your old (unwed late 30s) aunt or cousin, do you?
You should move to Shanghai. There are so many business opportunities abroad (I thought I was never working ever again?).
And my personal favorite, "By the time I was your age (TWENTY-TWO!), we had your brother already." Ew.

My trip to Shanghai next month should be a good time... I think I should find a husband before then so I don't get accidentally betrothed to some inane idiot with a doting disposition and no personality. Any takers, New York?
Normally I'd say, qualifications include good stature, a witty wit, a beautiful smile, and some gusto... but times are tough and I cannot be one to be so picky. So what would I settle for? Who could I see myself legally stitched to for the rest of my life? Who could actually keep me entertained for at least the next 50 years? Who could stand me, my laugh and my love for eternity? I have no idea... It's so daunting, I think I'd prefer choosing the spinster life.

Hanging up the phone that day, in complete shock and tear-stained dreariness, I realized how different life had become so instantly. I was sitting at my office at 6:45pm doing client research, ad work, and reviewing the notes on dad's idea of my future and all of a sudden trying to comprehend where I turned the corner into real life.